Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
