i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
