'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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