I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
