Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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