Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I cut my penus on the lid.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
