if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize