question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize