You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
