In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
