Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Randomize