honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
