I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
