Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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