he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
