His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
