Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I hate all girls vehemently.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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