oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize