The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
