i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
