just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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