she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Randomize
