everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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