Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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