youre lurking in front of me
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Randomize
