Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
