Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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