From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
