I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
