Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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