did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
