I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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