i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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