Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
