she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
no you cant smoke seaweed
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
