Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
