sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize