Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
