he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
