what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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