Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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