We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
