i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize