Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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