and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
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