Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(515): View more from Iowa

took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru

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(740): View more from Ohio

it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second

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(305): View more from Florida

you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out

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(732): View more from New Jersey

i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends

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(514): View more from Quebec

Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?

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(248): View more from Michigan

I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid

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(519): View more from Ontario

I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body

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