is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
