awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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