Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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