I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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