what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
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